The Carwright Murders
by Princess Florella
Summary: Lost/Potter Slash/mpreg/grid/xmas. Kate and Hermione discover forbidden love and try to live their lives in the future. But the world refused to change


snape landed on the island. His uncle was the owner of the set of LOST and allowed him pretty much free reign over the island. To have gay sex. His uncle was the owner of the set of LOST and allowed him pretty much free reign over the island. This allowed HARRY to go wherever he wanted to do during the filming of the series. As such, he was given free reign over the island. He was allowed. He was HARRY goddamn POTTER and his parents were dead.

It was during his shipwreck on this island that he impressed the staff of LOST with his knowledge of the jungle and how to make SHIPS out of SHIPS. This impressed JACK the most, because JACK was the head guy of the main in lost. He was the guy who originally got the main thing in the main shipwrecked with the pregnant chick.

JACK was impressed by snape's knowledge of SHIP building. JACK was impressed by this. So he GRADUALLY spent more and more time with snape hoping to build a relationship. JACK developed a MANCRUSH on snape. This was not wholly unrequited, as snape too had developed a OHGODIAMNOTGOODWITHCOMPUTERHOWIGETHERE with JACK. They gradually spent more and more time with each other. YOUR UNCLE THAT LIVES IN UNITED ARAB EMIRATES was okay with it, because he also did campaign stuff for McCain.

Eventually, SNAPE built a SHIP out of SHIPS to escape the island of SHIPS. JACK couldn't restrain himself.

"OPERATOR. I am OPERATING on OPERATION: OPERATIVELY OPERATE on OPERATING OPERATORS OPERATINGLY OPERATING on OPERATION: OPERATIVELY OPERATING OPERATOR'S OPERATIONS." Dwight OPERATED smoothly.

"I OPERATE completely, OPERATING OPERATOR" Jim replied OPERATIVELY, OPERATING completely OPERATIONALLY under the OPERATORS OPERATING OPERATION OPERATOR.

"Oh OPERATOR, OPERATE on my still beating OPERATIONS" She replied nastily, rolling up the window to the car. Ms. M. L. Shire of the Shire was tired of Frodo's bullshit. This was going to be a long drive to Hogwarts, school of witchcraft and wizardry.

"MY OWN CLONE." Frodo muttered in reply. This would be a tough plan. In order to destroy the one true ring of Saradon, he must first destroy the one true ring of Saradon. Obviously, this would require some doing on his part, as he slowly unsheathed his dagger.

"Now Neither Of Us Will Be Virgins." He coalesced

JACK SPARROW struggled against SNAPE on his BOAT of BOATS. At first, SNAPE was fine and romantic. He had a bottle of chardon bleu '96 (A good year.) But then SNAPE said the most fateful words ever fated. And violate me he did. JACK SPARROW cried all night, praying to his elder gods for relief from this OPERATION. But just as Frodo was throwing the ring in the blessed fires of Saradon, he discovered something. He discovered something important. He just didn't care.

"But I do care, honey! In fact, let me paint you a picture of my enthusiasm. I am currently balancing my entire body on the tip of my engorged member. Envision that in your mind's eye. Take your time, I can keep this up all day. In fact, guess what? I have begun to spin."

And with this, JACK BAUER and snape commenced to their deeds. _**Like all things Spanish, it was dangerous. **_SAWYER and snape recommenced this all night, and when the morning came, they realized only one thing. IS this latex? Or Oil Based?

It was Horse Manure.

It then hit both of them at the same time. That they must find that Matza, and they must find it fast. For it was already chANUkkahS. First they would check the bathrooms.

"You're gonna have to look me right in the eyes while I do it" Sawyer said.

"oh hee man you always do this" Johnathon Webber dribbled

"If you don't look me in the eye the pee is gonna go up to my heart and overheat it to death" Sawyer was counting pee seconds.

"I saw a smile~" Mr. Webber pronounced. He giggled rambunctiously, stealthily trying to escape the Island by building a ship and getting off with Kate.

AS they were drinking after dinner schnapps, SNAPE witnessed something beautiful.

"What the hell are you doing out here, Fred?! What the..what the hell are you — No! NO!! NO!!"

"this is well not very good,sorry"

"What the hell are you doing out here Fred?! How did you get out here?! Fred, if you're real, you better tell me right now! If you're real you better tell me right NOW"

"this is well not very good,sorry"

"... Dammit, Fred, dammit!"

It was during this time that they discovered the secret alcove under his bed. It was very small. They then performed the Chad.


End file.
